Confessions of a Foul Mouthed Pastor

As some of you may or may not know.  I have recently gotten into running.  I have so far ran 2 "typical" half-marathons, 1 half-marathon coming up, and a few more later on in the year.   I have also taken up obstacle course racing.  If you have never heard of it, here is what I do: superhero scramble's website.  However, I do these races very differently.  Before my first race, I got hooked up with The Superman Walks Project.  The Superman Walks Project is a group of individuals who are not focused on their own personal time, but on helping each other finish the race.  In many cases, we have those who have physical and mental disabilities racing side by side with us.  The team has pulled some up the a mountain in a wheelchair in the rain, aided other's getting over the walls, and going down a 300 foot water slide.  Needless to say, every time I race with Superman Walks, I make friendships that last well beyond the track.

   This was no different in the last race I did in Winnville, S.C. at Superhero Scramble.  However, this race touched me in a way like never before.  First, we made a young boy's dream come true.  The child is 10 years old, and has cerebral palsy. It was the goal of my team to get this boy through a 10+ miles course. A kind group, More Heart Than Scars pimped out his wheel chair for the race.  Over 45 people came from all over to help this boy achieve his dream.  That race has changed my life forever.

The second way my life was changed at this race was the nickname I was given.  As I said before, most of us stay in close contact after racing.  My brother and I decided to get there early to help where needed to set up for the race the next day.  Of course I received phones calls throughout the afternoon and evening from those in the group who were coming in from Florida.  When they finally arrived at 11:30pm, I began to talking with them.  And before you knew it, like the rest of them, out came a word that your momma told you to "not say because only stupid people with bad vocabulary use them."  Dang... okay, one down, no more to say right?  I'm not stupid, and certainly I can find a better word to use right? Sadly, two more swear words came out of my mouth that night. That next morning is when I was officially dubbed the "foul mouthed preacher."  Of course, the moment my name was given, I was repulsed by it.  I remember having every excuse for my behavior.  My parents cursed, I am not a pastor at these races,  let he who is without sin cast the first stone, pastors are human too right, cursing is that bad is it, well at least I am not as bad as you!  But, in the end, they were right; I am a foul mouthed preacher.  No matter what I said, many of my thoughts after being given the name are true.  I did grow up with a family who cursed.  I am a both pastor and human.  But, all of it was no excuse for inappropriate behavior.

Though I did not have time to think about my nickname in the race, I have had plenty of time to think about it after.  These are the revelations I have received from God.  First and foremost, I must remember that no matter where I go, I am ministering to the world.  Now, this does not just go for pastors, it goes for all Christians.  There is a world that is hurting out there, and we are called to help fix it.  Every opportunity is a place where God can use you to do good in the world, even if it is not where we want to go or do it that way.  I often reflect on the prophets of the Old Testament, where God called those to serve him in under unique circumstances.  Noah to build a boat in dry land; Abraham and Sara to sacrifice their son Isaac, whom they fought so hard to have and only conceived by God's grace; David taking on Goliath when he was just a boy; and Jonah who was called to preach to the evil Ninevehites (sp?).  God used all of these people, in times and places they never dreamed they would be, but they were willing to trust the Lord and what he had in store for them.  Today, maybe  we will not be building boats, traveling to far away lands that hate Christians, or even be willing to sacrifice our children.  However, this does not mean we are not called to minister in every situation when it permits.  Our words, or use of them, do make a difference.  Our actions, or reactions to situations do make a difference.  Our hearts can change the world, if we just let them become aware.  

Yet, as I pondered how my actions effect others, I also began to wonder how I was to overcome this vice.  Sadly, it is an old friend that has been around to longtime, but I just can't seem to get rid of it.  Yet, it is here that God revealed to me that this was the point of grace.  No matter where I am or what I have done, by accepting Jesus into my life as Savior, all of my sins have been forgiven.  Not just my past transgressions, but past, present, and future sins.  What an amazing God we serve that knows we will mess up, but forgives us ahead of time.  This does not mean that we get a free pass to sin though.  Instead, because we have already been forgiven, it allows us to recognize our sin, remove it, and move closer to God all the time.  The United Methodist Church's founder John Wesley called it sanctifying grace.  It is the never ending  and underserving love God has shown to his people, which allows them to freely move closer toward the Lord at every moment. 

I am reminded of when my father taught me how to ride bike.  At first my father kept his hands on the bike at all times to keep me from falling.  But, eventually he had to let go.  When he did, I was scared, but I knew my father was always right behind me, even though I could't see him.   If I fell, he was always there to pick me up and encourage me to try again.  And when I succeeded, he told me how much he loved what he already knew what I had in me to make it.  The same is true for my relationship with God.  I am scared of failing sometimes.  I fall down quite a bit.  I am even a bit rusty at times with this whole ministry thing, but God is always with me.  The Lord forgives me when I make mistakes.  But, he also allows me to see what my fullest potential is as well.  It is my prayer that God continues to shine a light upon my path, so that I maybe every vigilant to hear God call me when the time is needed to minister.  I also pray that those around me will forgive me when I fall.  May they pick me up. I guess in the end my nickname of "the foul mouthed preacher" isn't so bad.  Though I should have never said those words, it has allowed me to become a better person, Christians, husband, father, and pastor.  Thank you Superman Walks, for allowing me to hear God through you!  

Gay Marriage... Who Cares?

In leu of President Obama's reveling his feelings on gay marriage last night, I have to admit I have been a bit concerned? This morning made my concerned feeling not any better when Mit Romney came out only  to state he has and always will be against gay marriage.  Yet, throughout out the day it was the talk of the town; the water cooler was a buzzing, NPR Radio was covering, the front page news had it covered.  To be honest, by the end of day came I was tired of hearing about gay marriage.  Besides... who cares anyway right?  Does this really matter?

Yet, as I pose this question: who cares; I cannot help but wonder what this means for the great people of this country.  Does it matter to a group of people in this land who are ridiculed, teased, tormented, and looked down upon?  Does it matter that a "couple" who have been together for 20 years, and one go into the hospital, not be able to have their loved one in the room with them because they are not considered "family?"  Does it matter that "couples" attempt to build to a life together, but the law is against them, so at any moment they could lose everything?  Do we even care that in most states if a person dies within a gay relationship, not a single asset will go to there partner?

This does not mean that the GLBT community does not have to think either.  Have they considered the repercussions it could cause on America?  Is not their battle cry of "equality for everyone!", in a sense possibly bringing inequality to those who do not believe in homosexuality and gay marriage by forcing their views on them?  Has the community considered if granted marriage,  how the religions would be effected; such as would all clergy of all religions be required to accept and preform gay marriage?*  Has the GLBT community ever thought about the struggles Christians are facing when they are convicted by what God has said concerning homosexuality, and fighting for the equality God has called for all as well?  Has the GLBT thought about all the prayers, thoughts, and meetings of the various Christian denominations to discuss this matter?

I guess in the end, we ALL should care.  We should care about what everyone is thinking and feeling.   We should care that not everything is black and white as it is sometimes presented to be.  We should care that in every decision we make, no matter what side, someone will get hurt.  Maybe if cared just a little bit more we would be able to let love show to all.  As for me, I guess I will continue to pray for God's guidance on this issue....       


*within the United Methodist Church not all Heterosexual couples can be married by the pastor, based upon the pastor's discretion.

Time Well Spent

As my wedding day seems to be quickly arriving (9 days away), I have often wondered where all my time has gone. It seems just like yesterday, I was having my fifth birthday party at Mcdonalds in Louisiana. It seemed like yesterday, I was moving to a foreign land called Georgia. Man that place is hilly... Memories came and went of graduations, college, seminary, and so many other things, but the question that came to my mind through it all was it time well spent? Did I spend my time wisely, or waste it away as if I had so much more time have and spend?

And yet, as this week has come, more question have invaded my mind. In lieu of the recent storms that devastated north Georgia, I have decided to dedicate most of my time to relief effort in Ringgold, Georgia. For every crushed house, I wondered has my time been well spent? Every tree snapped, every family helped, was my time well spent?

My answer came today to the answer which has alluded me for weeks in the form of an envelope. As I was cutting and removing trees, I found an old military envelope amidst the debris. Thinking the envelope may have had some sentimental value, I took it over to the wife. Overwhelmed with raw emotions, the woman nearly collapsed over a simple envelope. But for her, it was a shred of what she had left remaining of her mother and father. As it turned out, it was the envelope in which her father asked her mother to marry him. The woman could not stop thanking me for finding this simple envelope.

As I sit here now, I wonder if my time has been well spent, and I say yes! It has been well spent cutting tree down to allow bigger trucks to get the rest. It has been family birthdays, road trips to Texas, and trips to Disney World. It has been serving on mission work camps, repairing roofs, and allowing a 90 year old woman to believe my deaf brother heard every word she talk to him for over a hour and a half. It is my prayer this night your time has been as well spent as mine.

A Recently Broken Mended Heart

Sadly, today I heard one of the saddest things I have ever heard in my life. After attempting to visit a member in the hospital, as I was walking out to my car I overheard two women talking. The conversation went something like this...

Woman # 1: Let us pray that mom OD's this time, and she never returns.

Woman # 2: I pray so too, Oh Lord if she does go into cardiac arrest, may they not resuscitate.

Woman #1: And dear Lord, may mom not be in any more pain. Please also take her away from this earth, so that we may not be burdened and pained anymore either.

I have to admit that when I heard these words, my heart was broken in two. Never had I ever heard such words come from what appeared to be somebody's mother and daughter before. It upset me so bad, that I took a moment in my car to compose myself before driving.

However, I began to drive home, the words of the two women echoed in my head. At first, all I could feel was sorrow for that poor woman, who was addicted to some drug. I was saddened at the fact that her own family wishes her dead, just so her and their pain would be gone. I thought about what caused this poor woman to get addicted to drugs in the first place. Was it simply just to try something new, and wham bam she was addicted? Or was she in such a state of hopelessness that she was trying to find a way to ease her pain? Could it have been that at one time this woman was sick, on pain medication, and could never stop taking them? Not matter the reason, my heart went out to this woman and her family.

Next, my thoughts transitioned to how hurt this woman and her family were. I have had pain and hardship in my life, but never where I wished myself or another dead. I wondered what this woman had done to have her family wish this on her. Did she have her daughter taken away from her? Did she steal from her own mother just to get the drugs that she desperately needed? How many sleepless nights did her family stay wondering if they would ever see her again? As I thought about all these things, I began to realize how these women could wish their mother/daughter such ill will. And sadly, I even imagined the drug addicted woman at times probably thought about the same things about herself. In many cases, drug addicts want to get clean, but the craving is just to much for them to handle. Not only losing that battle, you are losing your family in the middle of it all. Not only that, but the withdraw symptoms must be excruciating painful. I wondered if the woman had even thought about dying.

However, in the midst of all these thoughts, the story of the woman who had been bleeding for 12 years (Mark 5:24-34) came to me. I often wondered how tormented that woman must have felt. How she had tried countless doctors, medicines, and fold remedies, yet none of them worked. I could only imagine the physical pain that she was going through as well. I believe at some point she wished she would just die to. Yet, with just the touch of Jesus' tunic, she was healed. Thinking of that story, my sorrow turned to hope and thanksgiving. I realized how lucky we are to have a God who loves us. Not only do we have a God that loves us, but his love is always available. No matter how far we believe we have moved away from God's love, we are an instant away from receiving it again always.

My friends, God is the ultimate healer. Whether the healing is physical, emotional, or spiritual, God can fix anything. It is my prayer tonight that God breaks the bonds of addiction from this woman. I pray that the heal ing process for the entire family can begin. Finally, I pray that this woman's family can find it within themselves to forgive her for the sins she has done against them. God is never far away, you just have to talk to him in order to find him no matter where you are in life.

Wayne Vs. Dundee

OK, here's the deal. The other day I got into an argument with my best friend over who would win a fight between Paul Hogan and John Wayne. Why this argument came about, I am unsure why, but it did. One of many fights that seem pointless, but I am curious to know who you think would win the fight. It is my belief that Paul Hogan would win this fight, but my friend believes that John Wayne would win the fight. Below I am going to give my theory on this, and tell me what you think.

John Wayne: As a good southern gentlemen, I have a deep passion for John Wayne movies. They are something that I have watched since I was a baby. In my opinion, there will never be another actor like John Wayne. His character was the type that would kick butt, and ask questions later. You could put 12 people against him, and he would take all out without even thinking. However, it is my belief that John Wayne is a one hit wonder. He has no thinking skills. According to his movies, all he did was point and shoot. I mean come on, that's cool and all, but what about if the person he was against tried to outsmart him. What if his the enemy is the character that had already anticipated John Wayne's move and went around that. Some times it takes more brains than brawn.

Paul Hogan: However, how could we ever forget the legendary character of Crocodile Dundee. Here was a man that uses his cunning wit to out smart his enemy. From the movies he could look like a kangaroo, makes sounds that made him appear to be in other places than he was, and even hum and shake his hand and make a water buffalo move. I mean who can beat that? Crocodile Dundee even was able to move from place to place without even being spotted (Aborigines style). Plus, he had that cool looking knife that he could throw and hit anywhere he was aiming.

The question of the day is who would win this fight? Would John Wayne win because if his deadly aim, and take no prison philosophy. Or would Crocodile Dundee win the fight because of his cunning wit, and able to outsmart his enemies; always being one step ahead of John Wayne.
I leave up to you the loyal readers to decide the fate of the fight.