Confessions of a Foul Mouthed Pastor

As some of you may or may not know.  I have recently gotten into running.  I have so far ran 2 "typical" half-marathons, 1 half-marathon coming up, and a few more later on in the year.   I have also taken up obstacle course racing.  If you have never heard of it, here is what I do: superhero scramble's website.  However, I do these races very differently.  Before my first race, I got hooked up with The Superman Walks Project.  The Superman Walks Project is a group of individuals who are not focused on their own personal time, but on helping each other finish the race.  In many cases, we have those who have physical and mental disabilities racing side by side with us.  The team has pulled some up the a mountain in a wheelchair in the rain, aided other's getting over the walls, and going down a 300 foot water slide.  Needless to say, every time I race with Superman Walks, I make friendships that last well beyond the track.

   This was no different in the last race I did in Winnville, S.C. at Superhero Scramble.  However, this race touched me in a way like never before.  First, we made a young boy's dream come true.  The child is 10 years old, and has cerebral palsy. It was the goal of my team to get this boy through a 10+ miles course. A kind group, More Heart Than Scars pimped out his wheel chair for the race.  Over 45 people came from all over to help this boy achieve his dream.  That race has changed my life forever.

The second way my life was changed at this race was the nickname I was given.  As I said before, most of us stay in close contact after racing.  My brother and I decided to get there early to help where needed to set up for the race the next day.  Of course I received phones calls throughout the afternoon and evening from those in the group who were coming in from Florida.  When they finally arrived at 11:30pm, I began to talking with them.  And before you knew it, like the rest of them, out came a word that your momma told you to "not say because only stupid people with bad vocabulary use them."  Dang... okay, one down, no more to say right?  I'm not stupid, and certainly I can find a better word to use right? Sadly, two more swear words came out of my mouth that night. That next morning is when I was officially dubbed the "foul mouthed preacher."  Of course, the moment my name was given, I was repulsed by it.  I remember having every excuse for my behavior.  My parents cursed, I am not a pastor at these races,  let he who is without sin cast the first stone, pastors are human too right, cursing is that bad is it, well at least I am not as bad as you!  But, in the end, they were right; I am a foul mouthed preacher.  No matter what I said, many of my thoughts after being given the name are true.  I did grow up with a family who cursed.  I am a both pastor and human.  But, all of it was no excuse for inappropriate behavior.

Though I did not have time to think about my nickname in the race, I have had plenty of time to think about it after.  These are the revelations I have received from God.  First and foremost, I must remember that no matter where I go, I am ministering to the world.  Now, this does not just go for pastors, it goes for all Christians.  There is a world that is hurting out there, and we are called to help fix it.  Every opportunity is a place where God can use you to do good in the world, even if it is not where we want to go or do it that way.  I often reflect on the prophets of the Old Testament, where God called those to serve him in under unique circumstances.  Noah to build a boat in dry land; Abraham and Sara to sacrifice their son Isaac, whom they fought so hard to have and only conceived by God's grace; David taking on Goliath when he was just a boy; and Jonah who was called to preach to the evil Ninevehites (sp?).  God used all of these people, in times and places they never dreamed they would be, but they were willing to trust the Lord and what he had in store for them.  Today, maybe  we will not be building boats, traveling to far away lands that hate Christians, or even be willing to sacrifice our children.  However, this does not mean we are not called to minister in every situation when it permits.  Our words, or use of them, do make a difference.  Our actions, or reactions to situations do make a difference.  Our hearts can change the world, if we just let them become aware.  

Yet, as I pondered how my actions effect others, I also began to wonder how I was to overcome this vice.  Sadly, it is an old friend that has been around to longtime, but I just can't seem to get rid of it.  Yet, it is here that God revealed to me that this was the point of grace.  No matter where I am or what I have done, by accepting Jesus into my life as Savior, all of my sins have been forgiven.  Not just my past transgressions, but past, present, and future sins.  What an amazing God we serve that knows we will mess up, but forgives us ahead of time.  This does not mean that we get a free pass to sin though.  Instead, because we have already been forgiven, it allows us to recognize our sin, remove it, and move closer to God all the time.  The United Methodist Church's founder John Wesley called it sanctifying grace.  It is the never ending  and underserving love God has shown to his people, which allows them to freely move closer toward the Lord at every moment. 

I am reminded of when my father taught me how to ride bike.  At first my father kept his hands on the bike at all times to keep me from falling.  But, eventually he had to let go.  When he did, I was scared, but I knew my father was always right behind me, even though I could't see him.   If I fell, he was always there to pick me up and encourage me to try again.  And when I succeeded, he told me how much he loved what he already knew what I had in me to make it.  The same is true for my relationship with God.  I am scared of failing sometimes.  I fall down quite a bit.  I am even a bit rusty at times with this whole ministry thing, but God is always with me.  The Lord forgives me when I make mistakes.  But, he also allows me to see what my fullest potential is as well.  It is my prayer that God continues to shine a light upon my path, so that I maybe every vigilant to hear God call me when the time is needed to minister.  I also pray that those around me will forgive me when I fall.  May they pick me up. I guess in the end my nickname of "the foul mouthed preacher" isn't so bad.  Though I should have never said those words, it has allowed me to become a better person, Christians, husband, father, and pastor.  Thank you Superman Walks, for allowing me to hear God through you!